life's a roller coaster...

and one of my biggest phobia is the roller coaster.

Its a big ride that defies gravity at a certain point. It has ups and downs. When it is up, it is as if we are on top of the world and when it heads downward, there is this sick feeling dumped right in the guts. It speeds and finishes in a blink of an eye. Isn't life the same way too?

can't think straight

i had played on the field
i had debated all the way to kuching
i completed every assignment on time
i studied without any disturbance
and yet i still feel incomplete.

i am stronger but broken.

i miss the old not the new.

i wonder if i ever did cross your mind because my memory of the old keeps replaying....

drowning in silence and sadness

i find it amusing when someone calls and is able to juggle with your emotions.if its someone that loves and cares for you,you will enlightened by his/her voice.However,its the other way around when its someone 'unpleasant' calls...ngehehehe .but i am neutral *cough cough* sometimes.do you get the same symptoms as i do when the caller is your mum/bestfriend/boyfriend/or anyone that makes you happy?

1. will start screaming at the phone
2. won't stop laughing cause someone on the other side of your phone understands completely
3. the ability to share the same emotions even though we are so faraway
4. a big fat smile will be soon pasted on the face
5. everything seems much more happier cause you know someone out there loves you the way you are

tears for fears

i always hated how i look ever since i was a kid.

so till today,i think everyday "i know i am ugly and i will live with it.god gave me perfect body parts and i shall not forsake that"

ps:its not wrong for a human to break down once in a while.sometimes emotions are able to take over.

whats your ingrediant for a perfect day?

when i was in high school,my perfect day would be spending a hot afternoon with my dysfunctional family.there is sammy belly,self-proclaimed beauty syaz,turtle kz,pondan bergerak acap,silver-lala-dick shaveen and oh-so-sweet mars bars.oh oh and and and also deryckos rosales,sui khen and not to mention kah wai!!haha.but i was only with them in class during those afternoons.i wasn't able to spend much time because of unforseen circumstances.hakhakhak.

i still remember during those afternoons,the weather would be so unbearable and in front of us will be the woman of all the women teaching us ADDMATH!learning assmath,oops,i meant ADDMATH is hard when we are sweaty.soooo,we do our own entertainment.sing songs,be racist,spontaneous drama.

all that has change now.

my perfect day would be me being hardworking and not slacking.doing countless reports and not sleeping more than 5 hours a day also studying.

somehow,i don't regret not having any free time because i work better under all these WANTED stress.

so here is what i do when i am under stress:
a. KNOW that stress is a benefit
b. DO NOT COMPLAIN because complaining would not get you anywhere
c. KNOW that when we do not slack,it feels good looking at a completed work
d. THUS WE HAVE MORE FREE TIME.DOINK!!